Observe and Change My Program

Thursday I saw my old program and pattern of belief running. I played with it, started to buy into it and almost got sucked in. It is a pattern of feeling like I don’t belong, I’m outside of the group, not part of, not included, left behind, forgotten about and unacknowledged.

The first indication was when Robert explained how to ask better questions. I asked myself what question have I been asking lately that I need to reframe. It was, “Why doesn’t anyone ask to have a picture taken with me?” Immediately I reframed it. “Why do so many people ask to have their picture taken with me to share with others?” Literally, at the next break someone came up and asked to have a picture taken with me. Then I noticed someone else taking my picture while I talked with a trainee. LOL! That is the power of rephrasing questions.

When they showed me the picture I noticed my judgment. I didn’t think it was good. My belief is “I have to wear makeup to look good in a picture.” There’s another program to release. I’m making progress, since I haven’t worn makeup all week. Also I didn’t like the way my clothes looked. Why didn’t someone take my picture when I had on a creative outfit? It’s okay to release that too. Jeans is what many of the trainees wear. I’m not one of the presenters and I want to blend in and build relationships.

By the end of the day the pattern returned, got worse and I bought into the old beliefs more. After I left the seminar, I tapped on thoughts and physical sensations like aches in my back and neck. I didn’t look for past references, because I would find a lot more than the ones I’ve tapped on already. I want to stay congruent with my intention for this week. I simply noticed my thoughts, words and representations and remember it’s about how I perceive my world and operate from conditioned responses. I create it all because I know how. It’s what I’ve practiced most of my life. I tap and release the physical manifestations, the thoughts, beliefs and emotions as I use the global phrases, “Whatever this means, whatever the past references are, wherever this comes from, it’s no longer useful and I’m safe to let it go now.” I tapped until I released it. I took action to rise above it and observe how the pattern repeats in many relationships.

I made my blog post, then browsed FaceBook and found photos taken  that day and some of us dancing on Sunday where I am included. Dancing is my seminar happy memory. I shared one photo on my timeline and made another one my cover photo. I watched comedy, laughed a lot, went to bed, listened to the Soul Light Connection recording and drifted off at the end. When it stopped I awoke and my mind wanted to grab the thoughts about my pattern and start chewing on it. I chose to simply notice my mind’s automatic conditioned response to cycle into circular thinking which will only support and perpetuate the pattern, plus create sleeplessness. This week I have had the best sleep of any seminar week yet. That’s the pattern I want to create. I mentally tapped, turned the recording on to listen a second time and drifted off to sleep easily.

As I write about it now I have no emotion, it was an old pattern showing up again. I created it as a child, in high school, in my jobs and yesterday in the FasterEFT community. Now I reframe my questions. Why do I feel like an integral part of the FasterEFT community? How is it so easy for me to feel included? Why do so many people ask to have their pictures taken with me so they can share with others? Why do I fit in so well with this group? How do I feel so comfortable in the middle of this family of love and peace? — © Copyright B. Grace Jones 2014 All Rights Reserved.