Q&A: Body Shivering in Stress and “What Will They Think?”

Q Hello Grace,
I just wanted to ask. I’ve been solving one problem very long time. My body shivers when I get into stressful situations and I cannot control my body. I can calm down my mind but my body doesn’t listen to my mind and shiver on and in that stressful situation I cannot stop it. I’ve solved this problem partly – I had social phobia and my body shivered every time when I met someone strange, new or when I had to talk in front of people. I have already solved this part with EFT. However there are still situations when I have problems with my body control and it’s been almost one year and I tap everyday and the problem is still in my body. My mind is fine, I feel well and strong in my head but my body seems to be so weak and scared in stressful situations and I don’t know why. Have you met this problem? What do you think about it. I’d love to know your opinion. Thank you very much!
I wish you a nice day. ♥
Jana Šklíbová

A Dear Jana,
Sometimes it seems the more I clear past references, the more past references show up to be cleared. It is like the layers of the onion. Will I ever reach the center? Will I ever be 100% free? Based on the structure of problems and my personal experience, I have realized that there are some automatic programs that are so heavily supported with past references that they may never go away completely. But, they will definitely not have the same level of control over me they once did. Plus, I can change how I internally represent them and lessen their affect on my present moment.

My example is about all the work I have done around the issue of “What will they think?” I have tapped on that for over a year. In order to write my book I had to address and release all kinds of past references, especially regarding my family members and past romantic relationships. I was diligent and thorough, and thought I had left no stone unturned. Then I had a big surprise. Something I had completely forgotten about from high school was triggered without warning. It was huge and I needed help from another practitioner to clear it, and I am still working on little parts and pieces of it.

What I have realized is that the automatic program for “What will they think?” is so fundamental to our survival from the time we are born, that it is not likely I can clear every single reference. A little child must continually be concerned about “what will they think?” in order to survive in our environment. How else would we learn how not to get into trouble with our parents? The key for me is to realize that what I think they are thinking is not really what they are thinking. That’s where I get into trouble. No one can ever completely know what someone else is thinking. It is best to ask them, and even then a clear understanding is elusive, because the words they choose my not mean the same to me as to them. In other words, whatever they say is still filtered through my beliefs, experiences and perceptions. That’s why communication is so important and so tricky. So whatever I think they are thinking is more about me than them. It’s about how I internally represent my world. That’s the real stuff I need to tap on.

You may wonder what all this has to do with your question about shivering in stress. The point is, that whatever the past references are, there may be many that you cannot possibly remember. The main thing is to be persistent. Don’t give up five minutes before the miracle. You have experienced mental and emotional release, so keep tapping on the physical symptoms. As you tap, ask your mind to give you the past references. Whatever comes up, regardless of whether or not it seems to relate, address it and release it anyway. Keep following the trail. My experience in healing is that your unconscious will eventually lead you where you need to go to heal at a deeper level. It is always acting in love on your behalf to protect and heal you. Accept yourself right where you are now and gratefully receive whatever healing comes for you today. Continue to tap on the physical symptoms, every sensation or aspect.

You are not alone. I have a client with a similar situation and it has not gone away completely, yet she is still tapping regardless. If she has a breakthrough, I will let you know. Yours may be shivering, Helga’s was back pain and she tapped for over a year before her breakthrough. Just keep tapping. It is like the proverbial boulder being split in two. Was it the 100th blow of the sledge hammer that broke it, or was it the 99 preceding blows? Every blow counts as part of the process, even though we see no progress in the 99 that go before the last. Persistence is the key. Just keep tapping on whatever comes up. You will be as glad that you did as I am. Healing is a process, not a destination.

Love & Peace,
Grace